STANK ON MY HANG LOW: February 2006

Womens

Womens are the most frustrating part of most dude's lives. I love this. It poses a new challenge DAILY. After college life becomes somewhat of a routine....you get up, you go to work, you get off of work, you eat, you watch tv/read.....ok that is what MOST people do, I am still sophmoric enough to still smoke bongs nude, drink till 4, or maybe even a little inflatable miller chair races down Centennial Hill at mindnight during a snow storm.....BUT the point is, that stuff is pretty easy....womens on the other hand are a challenge

So far since the official "heart breaking moment" that my ex took off on my on that gloomy day (don't shed a tear for the Paigniac, hindsight 20/20 it was a godsend) I have been in a series of unusual "dating situations" and encounters since then

Let's update to today shall we?

***attention, names will be changed to protect the innocent***

although no one reads this shit.....

Let's start with Cat, we find our humble narrator.....alone, sad, beateb like a government mule....sitting in the house he once shared with the ONE woman he thought he would spend the rest of his life with....she decided otherwise, and ran off to the land of booger sugar, where nights become mornings and all is not what it seems......she was "nice" enough to "let me stay" at the house and still pay half of the rent.....she "moved home with her mom"....but LEFT ALL OF HER SHIT AT THE HOUSE....all of the clothes, pictures, memories, and so on and so on....depressing....YOU THINK???!!!

***Paigniac quit stewing and back to the POINT of this entry***

ah yes, well there is a method to my madness...this sets up the story of Cat

So there I am surrounding in memories, half shorn, half dressed, smokin the ganj, drinkin the black label, burning wood, breaking bottles behind wah-wah, digging a hole....you know the typical rigamorole of the scorned

then one day it hit me, that THIS ISN'T YOU FUCKER! Get your ASS off of YOUR SHOULDERS AND CHANGE SHIT! So I did, I piled all of her shit into one room, and closed the door, rearranged the place and went out on the town, had a few afterhours here and there, started to feel the flow again....but still in paign

Then I bumped into Cat, now Cat was a girl I knew from way back....she knew I had a serious girlfriend and respected that, but let's just say she let me know that if I didn't....we would be breaking a few laws of physics, I bumped into her about on the 4 week "anniversary" of the infamous breakup.

I have a few folks over, pop in the 89 Illini V Syracuse game, volume down, hit a playlist on my pod and pop a couple bottles, instant afterhours

dwindle, dwindle....it's just the 2 of us ***scenes missing*** I am now sleeping

NEXT THING I KNOW

http://ohsnaprape.ytmnd.com/

I am getting smacked awake...BY MY EX...I am birfday nekkid on the couch with no one in sight.....she start smacking and screaming at me...as I hear the front door slam

A quick squabble including my computer, some fireplace tools, a box of dishes all being tossed at me....I find out that Cat was wearing her robe and let her in the front door

D'OH

but what the fuck, she left me.....I was just tryin to get some stank on my hang low

needless to say it saved me from having any chance of crying like a girl and crawling back to my ex......but that wasn't the EXACT way that I wanted to slam the door shut