Football Update

Only got a couple catches....Pierre Thomas was our QB which was pretty awesome, but with our team being split with girls, they got most of the offensive action.

I played 90 percent of the time on D....I had to cover McPhearson and Hudson....um OK




















This is me and Brit Miller....one of the most down to earth and fun guys I met all day....solid cat, reminds me of a lot of people I would normaly hang out with. This according to him is the pose to make your muscles "pop".....didn't seem to work for me so good. Dude is gonna crack some skulls next year. Yet I saw him singing Ace of Base and reading a story book to children. CLICK CLACK!


















Here I am with the brothers Mendenhall....Walter on the LEft, and Rashard on the right. About 9 years younger and it would take me a good 10 more years to get my pipes to this level. Fun guys, and similar tastes in music....we had a lot to talk about, and they will be ripping through lines in the Big Ten shortly.....Things are looking up in Illiniland for football for sure.


The whole cast was out there though, Juice, Lehman, Brasic, the aformentioned Pierre, Dmac, and Pierre, the guy I talked to the most personally was EB Halsley.....he is a class act

we ended up raising over 10k in cash and merchandise for the Cunningham Childrens Home, and after 13 hours of working and one very red neck, OUCH.....it was all in all a great day.

Feel the Paign ILLINI!!!

So tomorrow I get to participate in a flag football game against the Illini


We were told we might get to use a backup QB on our team, and I am pulling for Isiah "Juice" Williams.....if I can catch a pass from a likely Heisman candidate




















The team is full of work people, and I am in no magnificent shape, but prolly 1 of the top 3 "atheletes" on the team. Most likely I will be talking trash and "accidently" get folded by a 19 year old shit brickhouse. Hopefully pics will follow.


I am looking into a digital camera for my birthday which will take this blog to new heights

stay tuned

Yeah I'm back at it

Thanks again Urbanabitches for letting the ban go through

I get it, I smoke therefore I am evil and I am killing all of you!

Here's an idea, how about opening a NON SMOKING place!

Oh...that's right cause us smokers pay your bills by supporting your bar.

Now you have an exuse, "Wasn't MY fault"

I hope they force you to choose what type of food you serve next

Deal Breaker!!!!

ANOTHER game us gents like to partake in is one called "DealBreaker"

Picture the PERFECT woman, I mean tight butt wit a little jiggle, Small C cup, Tone calf, toes all filed in a row, wears high heels to the grocery store, eats burritos in bed, drinks scotch, can quote Safe Men and every other movie I have seen.....will dress up in garters and stormtrooper helmet to BED, and it's HER idea........(ok, so not eveyone's perfect girl, get your own image!)


but


Has a Hairy chest that is unshavable, and looks like a cross between Tom Jones and Austin Powers


DealBreaker?

My answer is no on this one


Feel free to play along


I have a million, and will number then accordingly.....

1 - Swears like sailor, I mean at least one F-Bomb every 10 minutes, and ALWAYS, we are talking Church, in front of your parents, at PTA meetings....etc....etc

2 - 3 fingers, I'll let you choose the 3

3 - Size 26 Shaq feet

4 - Has 4 kids......by 4 different dudes

5 - To marry her you can only eat Beans, Liver, and Lima Beans for life....till you are dead


Remember, the PERFECT woman


marinate on that for a minute

Album, Track, or Autobigraphy

This is a game I play daily.....Basically somewhere along the lines something will pop into my bean, or come up out and about with friends that will eventually become a creation of one of these creative works in my life

My Album Title
My Recorded Tracks
My Autobiography


I've had a rough time documenting them, so this will be as good a place as any

so from over the weekend

Tracks

Cave Diddle
Digital Donkey


Autobiography Titles

There is a Clown in the Hotel Lobby
I Can Still Taste The Hot Tub

Paign Crash

OK....so last week I am at Guido's and I meet up with some guys taking some massive amounts of shots...when that happens I sniff it out like a dog and come running....guys doing this are usually jovial and willing to pass out spillovers.....usually a hot occasion

A WEDDING

They lay down the time, place, date.....etc....

Why not?


So here is a quick highlight reel by bullet point formation....since I was layin low for quite sometime, introducing myself, and coolin my heels....then I noticed a lot of people on the smoking deck.....that in most cases is the party crowd, which featured the whole group of groomsmen....it was on from there

- Smoked 2 stogies with scotch

- Had a great convo with a strip club bartender, he sboob were like cantelopes......I motorboated them later...she was quite the exhibitionist

- I danced with the mother of the groom aka "Mother Goose"....the song, "Beat It".....I kept my hands off of my junk, but did deal the imaginary cards

- We tried to catch a pigeon in a fish bowl yanked from one of the centerpieces.....he was just chillin on this beam above the porch for like, 3 hours.....we had to try toget him, we named him Doja

- I served many a beer to take the burden off of the cash bar, they stopped me when I went to start pouring jager shots........so I stole the bottle later on, and instantly upped my status

- Met my doppleganger....apparently when he reaches a certain stage of drunk, he is referred to as "mumblaya".....much like my alter ego "crazyeyes mcgee"....we hit it off immediately, but I never changed....he did.....wandered out to the golf course and passed out, when he was pelted by everything imaginable from the deck, including the ice bucket which was placed over his head later on.......he requested chain of fools 18 times, and the DJ did not have it

- In tribute to the movie, "Shout" was requested in my honor....yet no motage of falling sboob fell before me :(

- Found the one only other guy on the planet that enjoyed the movie "Haggard" as much as me, we quoted lines all night

- Flirted HARD with one of the maids of honor (there were 2 of them)

- Thought I blew it with my "honor" toast for another round of jagers....."If you can't cum in her, cum honor"....crass YES, but usually brings the house down amongst drunken dudetypes

- Got pretty pasted and we all headed to the bar, and I called a ride home from my buddy.....turns out the maid DID want some outta town strange, but I was pretty black-y by that point....my buddy who picked me up said "Some girl came out and grabbed your tie when you were leaving the bar, and tried to pull you back in"......"You karate chopped her arm, and said, I got mothin" and walked to my car

- BOGGLE.....................One side of me thinks that I was really spent, because this was HARD work making this evening pop, and being accepted.....Another theory is that I am actually growing up and looking for much more out of girls

I prefer to believe the first one



I'll edit if more comes back to me....I have been uber lazy, and was uber drunky, but I KNOW I have left some stories out.....I could share some of the groomsmen's stories busting on each other, those guys we kinda manimalish......and I likes that